Bonjour!! (Hello in french!) It’s Friday!!! This particular Friday means a lot of excitement and NERVES for me currently!! I’m excited because its FRIDAY, and I get to go home after work and have a rockin’ night with my love. I’m excited AND nervous because at 6pm tonight, I’m having a phone interview with my future college (sending that positive manifestation out there to the universe!!) This is scary for me to type right now because who ever reads this is going to know, and if I don’t get in, people will know that too…but! I finally took the plunge that I have been hemming and hawing over for 6 YEARS!! For those of you who know me well, and have known me since college…you know that I have always been here and there about what I want to be when I “grow up”. Well, since my junior year of college (I still remember this conversation with my mother about this topic SOOO clearly!..where I was sitting, what I was doing…what I was thinking…) I have been going back and forth about being a….MIDWIFE.
I have been fascinated and enthralled with women’s health, particularly, since as long as I can remember. I can remember vividly the first book I bought about health and wellness. I was, no joke, in the 4th grade in Mrs. Anderson’s class. I remember the cover of the book had a girl with a bowlcut haircut, with shiny black hair. She was holding an orange and smiling. I remember thinking I wanted to be her…she looked soooo healthy! I ALSO remember feeling really embarrassed about my book purchase, and didn’t want anyone to see. Why?? What 4th graders are thinking about that? I was…
Then in college I thought about working with women with eating disorders. I specifically got my degree in Child Development/Family Relations with the intent of furthering my education with a masters in family counseling. Then in my junior year of school I went to talk to someone about getting a nutrition degree also, and I was completely discouraged. Was that their fault?…hell no! I should have stood up and said, I don’t care how long it will take, I don’t care how far away from it I am, I want it! I didn’t, however…my b :-p All the while, I am still picking up health magazines at the store, reading books that will hopefully change my wellness for good (some of which were pregnancy and childbirth books…I just loved it! I wasn’t pregnant, haha), and delving into research on health/wellness on the internet
On and off, I have had a million and ten ideas about what I want to be; eating disorder therapist, real estate agent (I’m super in to real estate, haha), health educator, etc….but its always been between being a midwife and something else. So why didnt’ I go for midwifery back then? I was SCARED TO DEATH! Still AM!! As I have stated in previous posts, I over think things…just a weeeeee bit! Well, something as large as a future career, that holds a TON of responsibility, is undoubtedly going to be included in that over thinking thing…I overthink whether I should go to Saturday Crossfit out of fear…hahaha.
However! I finally, after the 279003rd time of hearing about someone going into midwifery and then spiraling into a remorseful slump, decided to just DO IT! You see, there are a whole lot of things that I think are amazing, and I want to do! However, I feel personally that Midwifery is the one thing that I will regret for the rest of my life if I don’t AT LEAST try and see…SO…I applied…tonight is the interview…and then it is in the universe’s hands 🙂 I will get in!
And for those of you that think I am going to move away if I get in…I’m not. It’s a distance learning program, so I will be doing it from the comforts of my home, or Starbucks. ONLINE LEARNING FOR MIDWIVES?!?!! Don’t worry…its not ALL online :-p After about a year, I would start working with a preceptor and doing clinical with a senior midwife 🙂 AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I get butterflies and all excited when I think about it!! Wish me luck!!!
Thank you all for being amazing and inspirational everyday for me! You definitely ALL are!! XOXO!!!!